Because I felt sick again, I stayed indoors. Rather than using this time productively to do either classwork or read classic American literature, I decided to finally start Final Fantasy X, which has been sitting on shelf for almost a year now unplayed. I'm up to the ship battle with Sin, which is the first time I've managed to score myself a GAME OVER, so I figure that's a good stopping point. BLAH BLAH UNINTELLIGENT COMMENTS ABOUT THE GAME UNDER THE CUT



-we're not even five minutes into the game, and I think Tidus is starting to look like a douche.

-I wanna meet the guy who came up with the costume designs for this game. I feel like he took every fabric shade, color, and texture, threw it into a splicing program, and then splat it back out and called it a "costume." Tidus looks as though he's been rolling around in the rejected pile of an Abercrombie and Fitch fashion shoot, and so did Auron, who later stole his coat from Vash the Stampede.

-holy mother of cutscenes, not even MGS4 could've prepared me for this. D: I'd like to get five feet before the next scene - FIVE FEET. GIVE ME THAT, SQUARESOFT, JUST GIVE IT TO ME.

-blitzball looks sort of like what I imagine embryonic fertilization must look like under a microscope.

-fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff I looked down in the middle of the cutscene to check the controls for the game and JESUS GOD IS THAT A TIDAL WAVE, OMFG I THINK IT'S A TIDAL WAVE fucking run Tidus run omg ;-;

-HE DIDN'T RUN

-I AM MAKING HIM RUN NOW

-............

-what the hell is going on

-fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

-no seriously, what the hell is going on

-goddamn you ffx, I have never played an RPG game before YOU SHOULD BE PREPARED FOR PEOPLE WHO FAIL SO HARD AT YOUR BATTLE SYSTEM CONTROLS LIKE I DO alkjsdl;kjldsa;lfdsa

-"this is your story" is that meta, Auron? are you trying to fucking meta me after YOU LET ME GET BLOWN OFF THE FUCKING BRIDGE you are a douche too

-I realize that RPG games require some sort of strategy, but god help me if I know what that strategy is

-Tidus is a douche who can apparently fight off giant fish demon bosses but can't keep the basic survival concepts together ajskl;jfkdl;sajf;dsa WHAT THE HELL DID JECHT DO TO YOU, KID?

-YOU DESERVED TO GET YOUR ASS HANDED TO YOU BY RIKKU, DOUCHE, YOU DIDN'T EVEN THANK HER FOR FEEDING YOU AND SAVING YOUR LIFE AND HOLY SHIT YOU ARE MORE USELESS THAN A FLOPPY COCK IN A LESBIAN PORNO

-so the giant asshole in the sky was a time portal or some sort? idfk what's going on

-my love of Wakka is entirely based on the amazingness of his hair and badly rendered Caribbean accent

-oh god the temple section was so useless, I went through all that trouble and wound up missing the door with the extra treasure NO FUCK YOU WAKKA, I DIDN'T NEED YOUR I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP ALL RIGHT thx for the bed bb

-omfg Yuna yes

-ahahahaha did Jecht seriously interrupt Tidus's wet dream to exemplify his need for a hearing aid? this game is amazing

-dude on the ship that I gave 100 gil to - you best be giving that back sometime >(

-there are way too many doors on this OH FUCKING CHRIST, FFX chocobos? seriously? SERIOUSLY? I'm not taking you seriously anymore, ffx

-while Lulu's tits are pretty amazing, I think it's unwise to look down the shirt of a black magic wielding guardian. just saying, Tidus

-ffffffffff you shouldn't waste your time talking to Tidus, Yuna

-no seriously, he's a douche

-..............

-IF YOU FOR THE DOUCHE, I AM NEVER GOING TO FORGIVE YOU, YUNA

-alksj;kldjfl;dsa sin BITCH, I WILL DEAL WITH YOU LATER


Anyway, now that the retardedness is out of the way, I have to say that FFX has made me painfully aware of how much video games have lowered my standard for good dialogue. ;-; Stop making fun of me, mom.